June 2021

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[HP Fic Rec]: "Chrysalis" by starcrossedgirl

TITLE: Chrysalis
AUTHOR: starcrossedgirl
FANDOM: Harry Potter
PAIRING: Snape/Harry
GENRES: M/M, First Time, Hurt/Comfort, Romance, Recovery
WARNINGS: *mentions of past child abuse, Harry is 18*
CONTAINS: *PTSD, panic attacks, anal sex, anal fingering, blow jobs, hand jobs, kissing, nightmares*
RATING: Explicit
TIME FRAME: Post-war/DH, not Epilogue-compliant, Snape is alive, no kids
WORDS: approx 84631
SUMMARY (given by the author): In which Harry is a tad messed up after the war, but Snape gives him a run for his money. Or: an epic tale of PTSD, recovery and gay porn! (For detailed warnings, please see author's notes.)
NOTES: Harry's POV

Excerpt:
“Oh my God. You have no idea how good it is to see you.”

In his rush to get up, his foot caught on one of the heavier books; he tripped, nearly fell. The only thing that kept him from landing flat on his face right under Snape’s nose was the rather desperate pin-wheeling of his arms.

“I assure you, the sentiment is not reciprocated.” Snape sneered. “I see that maintaining a vertical position is still proving a challenging task. Perhaps you require some practise?”
The insult barely even registered. Nor did embarrassment -- how could it, under the wash of pure, unbridled relief?

“You’re real.” Harry stepped closer, grinning his face off. His hands reached out of their own accord, grasping Snape’s arms. They felt reassuringly solid, warm. “You’re actually real.”
Snape shook him off. “Yes, Potter, we had already established that. Do pay attention.” He scowled, shifting minutely. “Reassuring as it is to find that your intellect has not been adversely affected by your latest... escapades, I believe I shall take my leave now.”
And just like that, he turned, striding towards the front door.

“No! Wait --” The panic was back, instantly, blocking Harry's throat. As if by some miracle, though, Snape obeyed, stopping partway through the corridor. His shoulders rose, then fell in an exaggerated sigh, before he turned to cast Harry a baleful look.

“You... you only just got here,” Harry finished lamely. Which hadn’t been what he’d intended to say at all.

“If you are labouring under the assumption that this is a social call, you are sadly mistaken. What do you propose, that we sit down for tea? Afternoon crumpets?”

“No, that wasn’t what I was trying --”

“I came to check that you had not somehow managed to expire from alcohol poisoning. As this is evidently not the case, I am quite done. If that is all --”

“But... but you can’t go, not yet! There’s so much I have to tell you, so many questions I need to ask, you can’t just...” Harry faltered, casting about for words. The sleep deprivation didn’t help, nor did Snape’s unimpressed stare. “I think they’re right,” he burst out, unexpectedly, entirely without his volition. “The Prophet, my friends, they all think I’ve lost it, and I’m terrified, because I think they’re right.”

Snape’s eyebrow arched. “That much is evident. Unfortunately for you, Potter, I couldn’t possibly care less.“


WHY I LIKE THAT FIC:
This is one of the best Snarry fics I‘ve read. So many things I loved about it, most notably Harry and Snape‘s characterizations. They felt so real and authentic. It is a fic about healing, about trust and friendship and love. It takes place after the war. Harry is a mess, suffering from PTSD, panic attacks and nightmares. He finds comfort in emerging himself in Snape‘s memories where he spends sometimes great parts of his day. He drives his friends away, who are worried about him and his obsession with a dead man‘s memories. But then Harry finds out Snape is alive... 

It is beautifully written. The delicate themes are carefully handled, the characters are layered and lovely and snarky in Snape‘s case. It is a fic to love and adore! 


General Linkage:
More information about my recs

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